We all know that they’re nonsense, but would you want one in your house?

Crystals…a load of bollocks, as you well know. Cute, but no real power, and a total waste of time. At least, that’s what we thought until the shop exploded.

It was one of those oh so tacky little places that sold crystals, tarot cards and incense sticks to ageing hippies at inflated prices, alongside badly made resin models of busty barbarian princesses…

Last Sunday morning it was reduced to a tattered ruin as every single crystal in the shop launched itself, pointy end first, away from the centre of the building. I’ve looked at the damn thing, and it’s like Swiss cheese. I’m surprised the its still standing….

Apparently the shop clerks disappeared, and recently we’ve been getting reports of a man with “diamonds for eyes” wandering the old city at night.

Looks like its time to read Beowulf again. There’s a new Grendel in town.