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Iconomancy Idol: Bob Hope

One man; four stars; a hundred million dreams.

He entertained U.S. troops starting May 6, 1941 and became the first ‘honorary veteran’ by Congress.

He entertained 11 different presidents.

He received 54 honorary degrees.

On every place where a military boot officially touched foreign soil, his golf cleats were directly behind them; he occupied hostile territories with laughter, shelled bombs of his own, and knocked ’em dead, war after war. The USO was his kingdom, and his rule was absolute, and hilarious, for the men and women he’d overseen.

An emissary of all stripes, his works have garnered him over one thousand, five hundred awards, certificates of merits, and other modes of acknowledgements. His death reports called a halt to Congress, the House of Representatives, and the White House, on successive counts; each time, life returned to normal.

With the death of Bob Hope by pneumonia, his ascension to the hallowed halls of the Avatars was guaranteed; each spontaneous act of unnatural behavior was marked with his trademark; a bad golf joke. Two mediums outside of Toluca Lake, California, found their table floating, and getting about four hundred and ten feet straight up, and moving at about sixty miles an hour westwards, going right through their roof. Neither spoke English, but gave their statements to police in what could only be described as ‘an in-joke- filled duet, probably practiced for a year or more’.

Symbols : golf attire, awards, televisions, military uniforms, and star-shaped objects.

Channels
For a minor charge Rapid Robert can effectively permit a second attempt to elude or evade a pursuer or captor’s grasp, by firing off well-timed bursts of humor; his nickname in his Vaudeville days, due to his own rapid-fire capability of wit and jest. On a successful Soul check against the opposer’s Mind score, the pursuit or evasion is impossible for a number of minutes of the positive difference between the two rolls.

For a significant Packy East will permit you to turn your Iconomancy into your new, probably higher, fisticuff-style combat mode. If you roll a matched success, it results in a TKO. A OACOWA will result in a permanent -10% shift, the next time you and that person square off. In his early days, Bob Hope fought under the name above, and knocked out two opponents in successive fights, with the third fight resulting in his own knockout, on the third night. As such, this comes at a cost; won’t work three rounds in a row on the same opponent, nor three times within the same week on the same target. Unless, of course, you want them to knock your happy ass out.

For two significant charges, Ambassador of Good Will allows you to walk, untouched and unmolested, through hostile territories without so much as a scratch. A parade could follow you through a dozen minefields, provided they were within the same territory (district, county, shire, neighborhood, etc.) and your visit was announced; this does include simply walking out of the middle of a gunfight by shouting “OK, folks — I can tell when I’m not loved and wanted …” followed by some truly bad jokes. Anyone firing upon, or otherwise making a violent action towards you and your non-violent entourage, must succeed a Self-7 check. A simple failure indicates they remain in place, bitterly angry but inactive. Matched success means they may shoot, at a -5% shift. OACOWA will put the Iconomancer at the polar opposite of the effect; Target of the Limelight. +15% to-hit shift with ranged weapons.

But, of course — the dangerous end of the deal. How could a man of peace, humor, and bad jokes and puns possibly lay hand to harm to those who cross him?

Easy: by simply Knocking Them Dead . Treat as a significant blast, with the sum of the Soul stat of the Iconomancer dictating the number of possible targets; each must make a Self-8 check to avoid being damaged from the stomach muscles contracting, jaw reflexively unhinging, and lungs from bleeding out. Oddly, his own terminal symptoms resembled them, and each corpse left in his wake will bear his mark; a dopey grin, eyes closed, and definitely ‘knocked dead’.

Mr Unlucky
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“Golf is my real profession – show business pays my green fees.” — Bob Hope (1903-2003)

2 thoughts on “Iconomancy Idol: Bob Hope

  1. ParadoxDruid says:

    Well thought out and well written… It’s a pity none of my players are Iconomancers. At least this is here for future games!

    Reply
  2. Neville Yale Cronten says:

    Bob Hope was the man. Red Skelton just creeped me out.

    Reply

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