Any problem can be solved with the right phone call.

The first part is finding the right place to call from. There are spots all over the place where your cel phone will display “no connection” but you’ll still be able to dial. They’re small, though, and there’s no real pattern to them. Find one and call your cel phone on itself. When you hear the weak hiss of a silent phone line with a bad connection, tell the line noise one problem. Big or small, it doesn’t seem to matter.

Within a week, you won’t have that problem anymore.

This is not always a good thing, and it is rarely tidy. There are a lot of ways to solve a problem, and people tend to avoid the ones that cause bigger problems. The mysterious benefactor has no such tendency. Of course, you can call again to start fixing the problems the first call created, but it’s easy to see where that starts to lead.

The worst part, though, is when your call gets returned.